There are a lot of single parents homes. Single mother homes where mother's are raising boys to be men, and girls to be women. Father's stop by when they feel like it, and baby daddy's that don't even do that. There are several mother's out here that do what it takes to raise their kids the best that they can. Their best may not be perfect, but because they have no choice its done, and done with a smile and a lot of love.
So for my Father's Day, I am celebrating those mother's. Those that were and still are the mother and father. Those that do it without complaining, and work hard to make sure that the child doesn't even notice. Providing enough love of two people, even if there is just one.
I will celebrate my mother on Father's Day. My mother was the woman who gave it all up for me. My mom went years not knowing what size shoe or clothes she wore, just because she wanted to make sure I knew more about my haves than my have nots. I never looked ragedy, I never went hungry, and was never homeless. She worked her but off and wasn't afraid nor shame to ask for help. With the hard work of her efforts and the help of family, she raised, and continues to raise her children. My mom did it with love, and strength, and I adore and appreciate her for it. As an adult, I still adore my mother, and all the mother figures that helped me become the woman and mother I am today.
This Ladiesm's public announcement is saying, that I am not discrediting those men taken care of their children, I got love for you to, but unfortunately, I never received those benefits, so can not relate! Thank you mom dukes, its all about you boo!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Half on a Baby
So my husband and I were discussing going half on a baby. We have been married almost two years, and have 3 children between the two of us without one together. Ours kids are all under the age of 5, so they are still pretty young, and still expensive. Well when aren't they expensive?! So in this discussion we were going through the pros and cons of having children right now and things that we would have to give up to have another baby.
Is this something that everyone does before deciding to have another baby, or your first for that matter? Is this a discussion your having with your husband, or just that live in boyfriend? Now don't get me wrong, I ain't judging, obviously because I had a son before becoming a wife, but slip up once shame on us, slip up twice shame on me. I think when considering to have children, this should a big deal and discussion.
What will you have to give up to have another baby? Will you take away from what your current kids have, or you have to ability to provide easily? Can you still adequately provide for your family and current lifestyle by adding another baby in the mix? These are all things that should be discussed. Can you afford another kid and still be able to eat, will you have to quit your job because you can't afford daycare? Can you afford that milk if WIC ain't available? Will you be birthing yet another fatherless child? We know the saying that it takes a Village to raise a child, but hell nowadays you barely got two parent homes.
If you can not financially provide for that child in such a manner that they are not comfortable you probably shouldn't be having more kids. Are you still selfish and want to hit the club or enjoy vacationing? I mean you have a right to be selfish, but keep your selfish legs closed if you not ready to give up your life and wants for the needs of your child/children. If you can't afford these kids without some form of assistance, well um, you probably should keep your legs closed too. The system is not meant to pay for kids you can't afford, its meant to pay for circumstance unpreventable. Legs opening and closing is a choice of which can be prevented. If you don't even have health insurance for yourself, why should kids be a thought. You can't even cough in good conscious so what makes you think the economy can afford you birthing someone else who we have no choice but to care for.
These are all things that are food for thought. This Public Announcement being brought to you by Ladiesm's is just saying: If you ain't got it, what makes you think I want to give up some of my check to give it to you. Marinate on that!
Is this something that everyone does before deciding to have another baby, or your first for that matter? Is this a discussion your having with your husband, or just that live in boyfriend? Now don't get me wrong, I ain't judging, obviously because I had a son before becoming a wife, but slip up once shame on us, slip up twice shame on me. I think when considering to have children, this should a big deal and discussion.
What will you have to give up to have another baby? Will you take away from what your current kids have, or you have to ability to provide easily? Can you still adequately provide for your family and current lifestyle by adding another baby in the mix? These are all things that should be discussed. Can you afford another kid and still be able to eat, will you have to quit your job because you can't afford daycare? Can you afford that milk if WIC ain't available? Will you be birthing yet another fatherless child? We know the saying that it takes a Village to raise a child, but hell nowadays you barely got two parent homes.
If you can not financially provide for that child in such a manner that they are not comfortable you probably shouldn't be having more kids. Are you still selfish and want to hit the club or enjoy vacationing? I mean you have a right to be selfish, but keep your selfish legs closed if you not ready to give up your life and wants for the needs of your child/children. If you can't afford these kids without some form of assistance, well um, you probably should keep your legs closed too. The system is not meant to pay for kids you can't afford, its meant to pay for circumstance unpreventable. Legs opening and closing is a choice of which can be prevented. If you don't even have health insurance for yourself, why should kids be a thought. You can't even cough in good conscious so what makes you think the economy can afford you birthing someone else who we have no choice but to care for.
These are all things that are food for thought. This Public Announcement being brought to you by Ladiesm's is just saying: If you ain't got it, what makes you think I want to give up some of my check to give it to you. Marinate on that!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Taking Care of Home
I am perplexed when I see women who have men at home but present themselves in the streets as single. Now whether you are shacking up or married, what does a lady act like when they have that significant other at home? What is okay behavior in the streets? Let’s talk about it.
Now I am married so I hold that commitment to the most high, as I should because that vow was made to He who is most high. My vow was to forsake all others, and love, respect, and honor. Is honoring degrading my man and ALWAYS taking the driver seat of the car? No mam, that means taking the back seat, or even the passenger side. The back seat means you letting that man ride shot gun making decisions that you may not feel is the best, but supporting it anyway. If or when that decision was wrong I then aid my man by picking up the pieces. The passenger seat means that you help that man make decision, by offering forethought, suggestions, and still allowing that man to MAKE THE DECISION. But that is just my commitment to my man!
So let’s talk about yours. What makes it okay for you to be in the streets at all hours of the night, leaving your man at home to mind his own on a regular? Now come on now I am not referring to the woman that takes time to herself and let her hair down from time to time. I am referring to that one that is never home; put hanging with their girls before taking care of home. So should you be mad when Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter become his away from home from you. When he meets that new chick who feels is pain, and allows him to share his, whose fault is it really. Now my finger pointing is not to say that cheating is okay, but guess what, if you don't take care of home, that next chick will. Your "in between the thigh power" may be what he yearns, but catch me if you can, will get annoying, and some that ain't that great but regular will become satisfactory to him.
So what you can't cook, you better learn, or at least learn 3 meals you can perfect, with the know how to make dinner appear on that table by way of order. Now you don't have to be Better Crocker, but boo, you must at least know how to cook that man one AWESOME MEAL occasionally. Especially if he is not your husband and you trying to make him that. A man, a good man anyway, compares what you can do to his momma. And lucky for you all momma's can't cook, but all momma's (well good ones anyway) have the know how to make sure he ate. Where is your know how, and if you don't have it, what are you doing to get it? Are you shame to refer to a book or asking someone if they can help? Yea keep on, because closed mouths don’t get fed!
Life is short and so is the shortage of a good man. You want one; don't destroy the one you got. Every f'd up man was probably because of an f'd up chick that made him that way........ But don't look at that in its simplest form, a man was born from a woman, my reference doesn't only apply to the woman who he gets his "power in between the legs" from.........Marinate on that!
This has been brought to you by Ladiesm's and the woman whose man has no complaints!
Now I am married so I hold that commitment to the most high, as I should because that vow was made to He who is most high. My vow was to forsake all others, and love, respect, and honor. Is honoring degrading my man and ALWAYS taking the driver seat of the car? No mam, that means taking the back seat, or even the passenger side. The back seat means you letting that man ride shot gun making decisions that you may not feel is the best, but supporting it anyway. If or when that decision was wrong I then aid my man by picking up the pieces. The passenger seat means that you help that man make decision, by offering forethought, suggestions, and still allowing that man to MAKE THE DECISION. But that is just my commitment to my man!
So let’s talk about yours. What makes it okay for you to be in the streets at all hours of the night, leaving your man at home to mind his own on a regular? Now come on now I am not referring to the woman that takes time to herself and let her hair down from time to time. I am referring to that one that is never home; put hanging with their girls before taking care of home. So should you be mad when Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter become his away from home from you. When he meets that new chick who feels is pain, and allows him to share his, whose fault is it really. Now my finger pointing is not to say that cheating is okay, but guess what, if you don't take care of home, that next chick will. Your "in between the thigh power" may be what he yearns, but catch me if you can, will get annoying, and some that ain't that great but regular will become satisfactory to him.
So what you can't cook, you better learn, or at least learn 3 meals you can perfect, with the know how to make dinner appear on that table by way of order. Now you don't have to be Better Crocker, but boo, you must at least know how to cook that man one AWESOME MEAL occasionally. Especially if he is not your husband and you trying to make him that. A man, a good man anyway, compares what you can do to his momma. And lucky for you all momma's can't cook, but all momma's (well good ones anyway) have the know how to make sure he ate. Where is your know how, and if you don't have it, what are you doing to get it? Are you shame to refer to a book or asking someone if they can help? Yea keep on, because closed mouths don’t get fed!
Life is short and so is the shortage of a good man. You want one; don't destroy the one you got. Every f'd up man was probably because of an f'd up chick that made him that way........ But don't look at that in its simplest form, a man was born from a woman, my reference doesn't only apply to the woman who he gets his "power in between the legs" from.........Marinate on that!
This has been brought to you by Ladiesm's and the woman whose man has no complaints!
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